Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you have. It is, in fact, the foundation of every other relationship you form. Relationships with family, clients, friends, business partners, and children.
The level of self-trust you have is particularly important when you are an entrepreneur creating fresh tracks in this world – making an impact in the life of yourself and others.
Being a successful work-at-home woman is one constant course correction. There is no step-by-step, absolutely guaranteed formula for success. If there were everyone would be a successful business owner.
The truth is the journey is different for everyone and success looks different for every woman. When you create something from nothing, you must use your intuition – which requires you to trust your gut – and you have to know yourself in order to do that successfully.
If you don’t trust yourself, you will ebb and flow with other people’s agendas. You won’t be tapping into your divine and unique gifts.
Here are 5 Personal Self-Checks to Help Clarify if You Don’t Trust Yourself:
1. You find yourself creating self-perpetuating cycles of stress and anxiety, never getting to a place where you are happy and satisfied; you don’t trust yourself.
2. You find you are creating success, but never seem to escape your problems; you don’t trust yourself.
3. You have this freaky habit of plateauing your income right at the place where you barely have enough; you don’t trust yourself
4. You focus on your worries more than your successes; you don’t trust yourself
5. You second guess yourself consistently, hesitate before making decisions or just feel uncertain most of the time; you don’t trust yourself.
The most prominent key to understanding that even if you are not going in the right direction you can course correct, you can adjust your life as the path develops, is trusting yourself.
Self-Trust is a Skill You Can Relearn with Focused Attention:
1. Find people you trust and surround yourself with them.
On the same token release people from your life that you don’t trust or don’t nurture you trusting yourself. Avoid people who undermine your self-trust like the plague!
2. Ground yourself each morning and throughout the day.
Set the intention to focus on positive aspects of yourself and breathe. You can set a timer every hour or so to check-in with yourself and ground more deeply to stay on track.
3. Balance the negative self-talk and speak kindly to yourself.
Give yourself permission to take a break when slipping into a negative space. In the beginning, your focus might be on simply being aware and catching the negative self-talk. The next step is countering it. Being kind to yourself increases self-confidence and lessens the need for approval from others.
4. Nurture yourself and allow playtime.
This can be particularly difficult when you work from home. It’s not healthy to always be working and mothering and caring for others. Book a massage, a run, a mani-pedi or other self-care technique into your schedule. You are important too!
5. Put things into words.
Talking about what you are thinking and feeling with someone else helps you to both recognize and release tension. Neuroscientists have shown that talking, with feedback, (not mirroring) can actually change the neurological makeup of your brain. Find a friend you trust to share with.
6. Practice makes perfect.
Think about when you learned to ride a bike or drive. You didn’t master the skills overnight. I would bet that now you don’t think twice about how you do these things. The same holds true with strengthening your self-trust muscle.
7. Keep your promises to yourself.
So often we are in complete integrity keeping promises we make to others but don’t pay much attention to keeping our word when it comes to ourselves. This means you need to pay close attention to the promises you make to yourself and don’t say things unless you mean it and can realistically follow through!
So take a breath, evaluate your personal self-trust meter, and have some fun. Life is meant to be a fun adventure – and so is building a business and creating a work at home lifestyle. You are going to make mistakes – you have to! It’s part of the process. Focus on eliminating – or at least curtailing to some degree – your negative self-talk and really focus on what it means, what it feels like, to trust yourself.