What Do You Fear: Finding What Stops You From Goal Attainment
Dr. Barbara Seifert, CPC, NLP
Goals are an important part of our lives; they are the stuff that dreams and hopes are made of. Some goals are very lofty, such as winning American Idol. Some goals are low, such as cleaning the fridge or walking the dog every day. Goals should be set neither too high or too low in order to motivate one into taking the steps toward goal attainment. But, what if there was a goal – something you really wanted – but you just couldn’t take all the steps needed to get there? It could be due to fear. Of what, you may ask? That is your quest – to uncover the root-cause of what you fear that is holding you back from the success you want and deserve!
We all hear those voices from our past; you know, a comment from a parent, sibling, friend or teacher. Often times, the comment was made to “help” us, such as “I don’t think you should do ____so you won’t get hurt in the long run”, or “it didn’t work for ____ so it probably won’t work for you”. There are a million other ways we get “help” in our lives; we probably have given the same help to others. Sometimes, people are very matter-of-fact, such as “that is a pipe-dream”, or “you need to work for a company and not yourself as you’ll never make any money”. Some people can just be cruel, “You’ll never make it”. When we are looking to reaching our goals, and finding success, these voices may return and deter us from the things we so desperately want.
As our psyches are very complex, we may not even be aware that these past comments can actually turn to fear that affects our behavior. The key is to uncovering what the fear is that prevents you from succeeding. Is it the fear of failure, of looking silly, of not knowing as much as you think, or the fear of success? Until you uncover the root of the fear, you will never dispel the “voices” that speak to you. Write down the fears in one column and then flip it to the positive in the next column. Usually, you will find that the fear is not as terrible as you thought and see the positives and possibilities you can achieve. The voices won’t go away automatically, but when you look at the positives and make a commitment to banish them forever, you will find that there is not a fear that can stop you from reaching the goals you desire.
Dr. Barbara Seifert, LCSW, CPC, NLP is the President of Committed to Your Success Coaching & Consulting in Orlando, Florida. She helps individuals to take charge of their careers, find the work they love and enhance their professional development to reach their peak performance. She also coaches in organizations to enhance employee engagement and leadership development. Dr. Seifert is an adjunct professor, a certified coach and certified in Neuro-Linguistic Programming. She is a writer for The Work at Home Woman and Forbes. You can learn more by visiting www.cyscoaching.com and Your Career Success Blog at www.allaboutcareerssite.wordpress.com.